went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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