omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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