I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
