if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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