if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
