3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
She tied me up with her honor cords...
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Randomize
