So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
