But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
