glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
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We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
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Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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