So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
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