Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
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