Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
this is an emotional support booty call
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
