Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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