I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
