I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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