And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
