I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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