with your own penis?
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
