dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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