there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children