It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Randomize