i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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