dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
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