I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
He felt like a one man threesome
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
