so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
