I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
