i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
