I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
