So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
