Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
