i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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