I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
