I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
there is puke in my bra ... again
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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