I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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