the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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