ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
