Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
