Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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