you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
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