I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I'm at about main and main street
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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