At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
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