it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
