this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
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Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
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We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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