Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
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The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
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Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
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