me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
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