ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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