So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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