so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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