HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
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he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
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And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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