Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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